Speak Soft, Play Hard

By: Matt Schifferle

Why Staying Humble can Hurt Your Progress

Being raised in the martial arts, humility and having a humble spirit was always something I was taught to strive for.

I've been expected not to "have a big head" and to be humble as a lowly monk begging for his supper. In the past, if someone said I was fast, had great technique or could jump high I felt I had to be humble and say things like "na I can't really jump that high, I'm not that fast and actually I'm not that strong. Other times, I might say something like "Sure I might be decent enough but I'm not even close to where I want to be be right now." Every time someone attempted to pick me up, I would knock myself right back down again. I thought it was the right thing to do. The polite thing to do. But you know what? Humble sucks.

I've come to believe that humility is another false ideal. It's another one of those things that is supposedly the right thing to do and will improve our lives but in reality just sucks us dry of life and resources. I'm done with humble, and I'm throwing away my humble pie. I'm standing tall, and shouting into the world I am strong, I am fast, I kick butt and I'm good at what I do.

I've come to discover that I never helped the world by being humble. If I won over a friend in a mountain bike race and he said I was fast but I said "Na, I felt slow today" how does that help my friend? It doesn't. In fact, it brings him down! If I am saying I wasn't fast then he must really be slow because after all I did beat him. And if he did cross the line before me and I said I wasn't all that fast then I just stole some of his glory from him. After all, it's pretty easy to win over someone who isn't all that good. By down playing my skills I'm down playing his as well.

It drives me nuts when people try to be humble and constantly stay low. They can't take a compliment and heavens for bid they actually see some value in themselves. Some might look at these actions and think it's best to stay humble but I don't call that humility. I call that abuse. You wouldn't go up to someone and tell them "I don't think you are all that special and your skills are not that great" would you? Of course not! It would be cruel to do that to someone else so what does that mean when we do it to ourselves through the act of humility?

I believe the whole point of fitness is to make ourselves stronger, more powerful and over all more capable with not only our bodies, but our lives. How can anyone possibly build themselves up and become stronger if they are constantly knocking themselves back down. It's like being picked up off the ground and then purposely falling right back down again. Other people will only pick you back so many times before getting tired of the chore. After a while, you're going to have to pick yourself back up if you ever hope to stand tall.

I'm not saying that it's time to brag to the world about the home run you hit last year or that you can bench 200 pounds. Throwing off the shroud of humility is all about staying real to yourself. The person who believes they are the best thing since Brad Pitt is doing just as much damage to themselves and others as the next guy who believes they are next to worthless. The key is to truly recognise your own personal abilities for what they truly are and see their value. I'm not as fast as Lance Armstrong but does that make me slow? I can pass first time riders like they are standing still, does that make me fast? In both cases, we can see how judging our own worth by comparing ourselves to to others is sure to delude and blur our own self worth. In the end, I believe I am strong and fast and my goal is to become strong and faster end of story.

So I give you this challenge. For the next week or so watch your speech. Be on the look out for any self abuse that might be mistaken for humility. If someone is faster, stronger or more skilled than you, recognize it and admire it. You have no idea how empowering it can be to recognise other people's strength. In fact, recognise the strength and capability of every single person around you. Everyone has power and strength and just because they might not perform as well as you that doesn't mean they don't have strength. It's very empowering to discover just how strong those around you really are. Of course just because someone is stronger than you that doesn't make you weak either. Give yourself 100% credit for everything you have accomplished. No matter what you do, there are millions of people who can't or won't do what you have done today so stand up, take credit and give yourself a pat on the back. Only then can you start to recognise your own personal power and start to cultivate it into greater things.

Be fit and live free,

Matt Schifferle

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